Momma, what happened to the neighborhood?
Community Building Series Part I
One of the constant themes that Home Depot commercials hit on is the idea of building the ultimate backyard. Have you seen these ones? A family turns their typical rear plot of land into a haven full of Trex decking, bright flowers and fresh sod, with a gleaming stainless steel grill to bring it all together. The concept is to create a space to relax—a refuge from the rest of the world and a post-5pm retreat after a tiring day.
I’ll admit that these ads strike me in two ways. One, I want that backyard. But Two, on a deeper level I wonder if there is something here for us to consider. Has our culture become used to a world where we spend the bulk of our time confined to our parcel lines while having little meaningful interaction with our neighbors?
There used to be a day and time in our culture where kids played outside more often, where families knew and relied upon households next door, and where it was a norm to feel a sense of connectedness amongst neighbors. In thinking back to when you were a kid, did life in your neighborhood seem a bit more interactive and relational than your experience today? Did people trust each other more readily? Did passersby wave? Did you play outside without worrying about Megan’s Law registrants? Were your parents able to let you roam around a little more?
Let’s face it, after the commute home from work it’s easy to find ourselves so tired and busy that the concept of getting to know our neighbors seems unrealistic, impractical or even inconvenient. So we get home from work, shut the garage door quickly in order to avoid others, stay behind our fences, and then turn on one of our screens in order to zone out. Sure, privacy is essential to a healthy lifestyle, but if life’s standard posture is to have very limited interaction with neighbors, then our communities will suffer.
What happened to our neighborhoods?
Part II: Finding Treasure in the Front Yard (coming next week)
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Posted by Ryan Lundquist
on Aug 12 2008. Filed under Viewpoints.
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Interesting thoughts, Ryan. I’ll look forward to hearing more about what treasures there are to find in the front yard in your next article. Thank you.
I always try to waive at everyone in my neighborhood when walking and driving. I think it may also be a factor of the society we live in today. The are so many distractions through all of our screens and media outlets, that we would rather connect remotely than in person.
Great article Ryan. The dream or goal there kind of reminds me of the first Christian Church 2000 years ago back in Acts 2. Kind of reminds me of what the Christian church can be today.
I grew up in the time when everyone was outside playing together and the parents all hung out too. Now, I’m sorry to say, I don’t know many of my neighbors well at all. This article and the ones to come may serve as the wake up call we all need…..
I think there is also an issue with safety. Years ago, sexual predators were not as big of a fear as they are today. I would not let my kids play in the front yard unattended. I would not let the neighbors supervise them unless I knew them VERY well.
I totally agree. I have great memories of my childhood out front playing with the neighbor kids. And I live back in the same house now as a kid and don’t barely know any of my neighbors. I don’t take the time to really talk with them that much due to always being tired and busy. So sad! I would love to have the kind off relationships that my parents had with their neighbors, but I need be able to make the sacrifice of my time to do it.
Thanks for all the comments everyone. Many good points. The safety concern that “H R” mentioned is surely important and for the record I do not let my 2 and 4 year olds play in the front unattended. But beyond that, why is it that as a culture we have generally let ourselves slip into a lifestyle that stays isolated from people? If we experienced deeper community when we were kids, then what happened between then and now to stop or hault that experience?
I have lived in the area 37 years and the times have changed. My mother let us(all three) have the run of the neighborhood and I notice major changes why parents dont anymore. Safety is the major one not only are people not looking out for each like in the past most of the streets have people driving to fast on streets that were not designed to flow that much traffic.
When I was young we were out making friends everyday and if you didnt make friends the other kids thought you were a freak ….somwhere along the years that has turned the other way.
Ryan,
I couldn’t agree more! I wholly agree with your summary statement, “If life’s standard posture is to have very limited interaction with neighbors, then our communities will suffer.”
Looking forward to the next article